I'm not the only one who blames mom.

While drooling in front of the pastry case at a lovely dining establishment:

Talent: "Do you think breathing this pastry goodness air will make me gain weight?"
Me: "Yes. We should leave right now. I swear, five pounds just attached itself to my left thigh."
Talent: "Run! Run away! Run it off and run away! Mom's thighs are right behind us!"